i need to feel your warm body on me
i bought a skirt today
and almost cried when i had no money for pretty shoes.
oh my word!
i
am
turing
into a
girl.


ew.

i have no idea why i even want to look good lately
i have no one to impress...
i guess looking nice for yourself would be a good answer
i'll let you know if it is the right one when the time comes.

last post = lame
tuesday = lame

its weird being so close to a person,
a few feet away really,
and not being able to say anything or do anything about it.
i can't believe how much my mood dropped
i cant believe that one person can change my ENTIRE mood
that one person can actually make me feel two completely different things in one day...

do you ever think about how you affect a person's day?
how you could possibly be the reason for their mood?
if you knew...would you care?
would you try to act and be and do everything right for another person's emotions?

i guess it depends on the person.
i guess jerks really wouldnt care either way.
i bet he would be too stoned to even know that feelings exist.


so i've been having a lot of deep conversations with julie lately...

one thing that we convinced ourselves lately,
which i admit is silly,
is that we'll probably HAVE to settle.
like the person that we create in our minds is never going to come around
because they don't exist.
what we want boys to be-
they never will be...
because sadly every guy has the potential to be a jerk...
and even the right guys
the ones who seem to be perfect for us...
we won't like
and we will never be able to figure out why.

another brilliant thought directly from the mind of julie:


"Two out of three dentist recommend that Billy Bob Thorton will play a drunk in his next movie."


brilliant...is the only word that comes to mind.
wait..
amazing.
amazing AND brilliant.

yes.



settling might not be so bad.
i've done it on more than one occasion.

i just hope i can do it happily.
cause thats all we want from life
to be happy.

duh.

come on...
you knew that!

;)

as for right now
i think i am going to work on myself
before i work on trying to impress anyone else.
does that sound right?
does that matter?
don't mind me..
i've been in the mood to question everything lately.
cant hurt
can it?

i guess thats all for now.


oh,
in case i dont see you again
good afternoon
good evening
and goodnight
:)